I'm almost to the end of my one-month Compact Challenge and my resolve is in major disrepair. I've found myself looking for "loopholes"...reasons to purchase something new, even though I know (I KNOW) it's not something we need.
One thing that came up...birthday presents for people outside of our home. To me, this was an obvious exception to the challenge. If the idea was to not purchase things for OUR home...what we bought for other people didn't really matter. I don't want to go imposing our choice onto other people.
That all sounds fine...maybe even justifiable....BUT (and this is a BIG butt ya'll)...I found that it really just gave me an excuse to get in the toy aisle and go a little loopy!
My major violation started with the purchase of a Lalaloopsy doll for Harper. Exactly one month after Christmas....after I said that these kids do not need ANY more toys...what am I doing? Buying her a flippin' doll! Here's the thing...we're invited to a Lalaloopsy themed Birthday Party in a couple of weeks...and the guests were told they could bring their loopsy doll along for the fun!
It was a very casual mention on the invite...it's not like having your own doll is going to be required to get in the door...clearly, no-pressure. Yet all I could think was, "Well obviously Harper needs one of these dolls!" Needs? Really, I just wanted her to have one to take along because it seemed so cute and fun.
My first plan was to try to find a 2nd hand one. Nothing came up. Then I thought I'd just look at the store. This, of course, immediately turned into me purchasing one for her. Then...I found some others on Clearance! I thought I'd get one as a gift to give the Birthday Girl at the party...but then...it was SUCH a sweet deal...I had to buy TWO (thinking I'd set one back for Harper's birthday in March too).
If you're counting...that makes 3 Lalaloopsy dolls purchased in one day. Yup. That's the sound of me falling OFF the wagon...HARD!
I really WAS trying to talk myself OUT of them...but I have YEARS of experience talking myself INTO purchases...and that side won this round.
I know this is a lot of space to dedicate to a seemingly unimportant purchase. I really do want to figure out the "WHYS" of these behaviors and I feel like ignoring this mistake would be a missed opportunity to do a little soul-searching. I can honestly say that I've felt pretty proud of my commitment to The Compact until this point. I'm even planning on continuing past our original one-month goal. I know that mistakes are bound to happen...and that I should learn from them and move forward.
So what can I learn from this? Clearly...I have impulsive shopping tendencies that left unchecked can spiral out of control! (I won't even mention the etsy searching I was doing for handmade Lalaloopsy clothing and accessories....sheesh...I was in spiral-mode people!)
In the end...I think it really is as simple as the basic concept of NEED vs.WANT. I've noticed that the only times I've been enticed to cheat...including the two times that I actually did...were when it came to purchasing things for the kids. I want to give them everything, and sometimes that makes it hard for me to see that they don't really need it.
I think this will continue to be an area I'll have to work on...but...I'm DETERMINED to make change and I realize that this is a process.
For now, I'm recommitting to moving on and making better choices! Wish me luck :)
Audrey
good for you for being honest. Have you ever read Stephen Covey? He has a thing called the 5 Why's - it is about repeatedly asking why until you find the root cause. This may be a direction of research for you because I think you touched on it, there is something underneath why the impulse shopping, especially for the kids. I can definitely relate. Anytime I see something cute for the girls and it is a deal, I think I will save it for a birthday or special occasion. But there is something behind the impulse shopping for sure. I think for me it is akin to people who fill themselves with potato chips to fill an emotional hole. I think that when I make needless purchases I am trying to fulfill something else. But I have managed to make a lot of changes and be much more committed to a budget, planning, and I use a lot of restraint now. I value good quality things and buying them less often. It is more rewarding in the end. You are awesome and I am so excited about your future posts :)
ReplyDeleteDefinitely going to check out his work!
DeleteI'm glad you can relate...sometimes I feel like a lunatic with all the self-talk going through my head and I just think, "Seriously...it cannot be THIS difficult for normal people to make a purchase!"
I think I have a number issue too...like if I see a good deal on something it's hard for me to only buy one...hoarding tendencies at work perhaps?!?!
I have a lot to learn...thanks so much for sharing!!!